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How to set your own price for massage therapy

Earlier in the year I began offering a special kind of discount to existing clients, people they referred, and folks I met networking. The structure of the discount is "pay what you can" for a particular service (craniosacral therapy). I found that few people took me up on it, and eventually I learned why: most people have no idea how to choose their own price for a good or service.

This is not surprising, considering that almost all purchases are structured in a different way: seller tells you the fee, then you decide if you want to buy or not at that price. To invite someone into a completely different structure—you tell the seller your payment, and she trusts you to truly pay what you can—places most folks way out of their comfort zone.

Helping people through their discomfort and toward their own authentic payment amount turns out to be very simple. The three step process is explained later in this article.

Discomfort points the way to healing

I view this discomfort as a feature, not a bug, because such discomfort points to areas in ourselves that could use some healing. Thus, the offer not only includes a discount, but an opportunity for healing some issues with money a person might have!

The opportunity is self-selecting, because a person has to be willing enough to face their discomfort just to take me up on the prospect of "paying what they can". So only people ready to move past whatever is in their way show up in my office; folks who are still letting things hold them back don't even call. This turns out to be a good thing, because craniosacral therapy works best for people who are ready to let go of things that no longer serve them.

Money issues

What is it about money with which many people, including myself, feel so uncomfortable? Most of the people who manage to set aside their discomfort long enough to receive a pay-what-you-can session don't get out the door without confronting it when it's time to pay.

Many ask what the cost of the session would normally be—they want a reference point outside of themselves, which can be useful but is not a substitute for being in touch with what's true inside about their ability to pay. More than one client has wanted to just leave the money somewhere and escape without handing it to me. This goes along with a common fear, that the amount they have chosen is "not enough" and will somehow upset me.

Translation: "I'm not sure I can really trust you to mean what you said. What's the catch with this whole pay what I can thing anyway?"

Building trust builds relationships

There is no catch, but there is more than one right way to do things. I'm not convinced that our usual set fee for service structures are always the best option. All structures have pros and cons, and set fee structures function well if what you need is a minimum of trust and a minimal relationship.

For example, the store clerk doesn't have to know who you are or ever see you again to know if you've handed him enough money to pay for what you want to buy. Obviously bodywork is very dissimilar to a store purchase; the relationship is paramount, and higher levels of trust are required.

Theory is one thing, but most of my pay-what-you-can clients needed practical help. Here is the simple process I began to take them through to help them discover their authentic payment:

Three steps to setting your own price for bodywork

1. A person can easily imagine a price that's too high, right? Think of an amount that' s definitely more than you can afford.

2. A person can also imagine a price that's too low. Think of an amount that's so low that you would feel insulted paying only that much.

3. There. Your right amount is somewhere in between those two numbers. You can iterate through this process if you need: check out the number exactly in between your first two amounts, decide if it's the new high or the new low, and repeat until you've found the right amount.

The right amount will feel comfortable

A person may still feel uncomfortable about other things, such as wondering whether or not I'm serious about letting them pay what they want, but the number itself won't cause discomfort. And after going through the whole session & payment process a time or two, any other discomforts can drop away as well.

For me, pay-what-you-can for craniosacral services has been working well. People who are drawn to the work get to experience it affordably, which means they can come back for followup sessions, and everyone has paid generously. And even though the amounts are different from person to person, I can feel that everyone is paying exactly the right amount, and that feels great.

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